All my fears and failures...
I've been attending my Chemistry friend's church for a few months now, going for cell and the services. I think the cell sessions have been quite wonderful, although I'm still far from opening up...
Last Saturday, the pastor was speaking about evangelism and inviting our friends to a Good Friday musical in church. It reminds me of how my own friends invited me to church when I was in JC1. However, during this sermon, I kind of felt like I was 2 weeks back.
2 weeks before this, it was a visiting pastor who spoke, and he was speaking on the symbolism of the signet ring in the Bible. He said that the signet ring is a sign of power and authority, and he spoke about how we should have the authority and power from God to manage our lives properly. One of the things that he said which struck me (I was feeling somewhat tired, but I was perked up when he mentioned this) was how we should also be able to manage our lives without the things of our past tying us down.
For pretty much the rest of the sermon, I was still thinking about the things in my past that still tied me down. No one is perfect, and indeed I also have my share of mistakes and regrets, and I have lost friends through some of these mistakes. I went up during the altar call, and I was quite surprised when the song "Mighty to Save" was played. It was a song I didn't think much of last time, but it spoke to me during my time in San Diego. Furthermore, while I was in San Diego, I also had to face my past again. Seems that Might to Save was indeed a really apt song for the moment...
Last Saturday, I couldn't focus on the sermon, but kept thinking about this, even though it was 2 Saturdays before. As I thought through the song, I was deeply struck by the lyrics. All of us, we have our share of mistakes, faults, regrets, things that we wished never happened, things in our past that we often wish we could change or erase. They are especially painful when the unpleasant memories were caused by ourselves, even though sometimes the unpleasant effects were unexpected. Yet, God knows all these, and He takes us just as we are, including all of these fears and failures.
What I realised, much to my shock, was that this struggle I've been facing was partly due to fear, fear of my failures, fear of making the same mistakes again. I was stunned to realise the extent to which I've been consumed by fear. Yet, to be truly myself again, I must have courage, to know that mistakes can still happen, but not to be fearful of them. Courage to be who I really am.
To stand forth with courage, with hope, and be truly myself. Not to avoid mistakes, but to learn from them as they come.
So take me as You find me
All my fears and failures
Fill my life again
I give my life to follow
Everything I believe in
Now I surrender
Last Saturday, the pastor was speaking about evangelism and inviting our friends to a Good Friday musical in church. It reminds me of how my own friends invited me to church when I was in JC1. However, during this sermon, I kind of felt like I was 2 weeks back.
2 weeks before this, it was a visiting pastor who spoke, and he was speaking on the symbolism of the signet ring in the Bible. He said that the signet ring is a sign of power and authority, and he spoke about how we should have the authority and power from God to manage our lives properly. One of the things that he said which struck me (I was feeling somewhat tired, but I was perked up when he mentioned this) was how we should also be able to manage our lives without the things of our past tying us down.
For pretty much the rest of the sermon, I was still thinking about the things in my past that still tied me down. No one is perfect, and indeed I also have my share of mistakes and regrets, and I have lost friends through some of these mistakes. I went up during the altar call, and I was quite surprised when the song "Mighty to Save" was played. It was a song I didn't think much of last time, but it spoke to me during my time in San Diego. Furthermore, while I was in San Diego, I also had to face my past again. Seems that Might to Save was indeed a really apt song for the moment...
Last Saturday, I couldn't focus on the sermon, but kept thinking about this, even though it was 2 Saturdays before. As I thought through the song, I was deeply struck by the lyrics. All of us, we have our share of mistakes, faults, regrets, things that we wished never happened, things in our past that we often wish we could change or erase. They are especially painful when the unpleasant memories were caused by ourselves, even though sometimes the unpleasant effects were unexpected. Yet, God knows all these, and He takes us just as we are, including all of these fears and failures.
What I realised, much to my shock, was that this struggle I've been facing was partly due to fear, fear of my failures, fear of making the same mistakes again. I was stunned to realise the extent to which I've been consumed by fear. Yet, to be truly myself again, I must have courage, to know that mistakes can still happen, but not to be fearful of them. Courage to be who I really am.
To stand forth with courage, with hope, and be truly myself. Not to avoid mistakes, but to learn from them as they come.
So take me as You find me
All my fears and failures
Fill my life again
I give my life to follow
Everything I believe in
Now I surrender
posted by Guangrong at
2:16 am
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